If I Have not Love...(Caution: This Got Long)

        Good morning, evening and afternoon. God bless your life. It's been a while since I've written a blog post. I've been busy working on some things, including a nationwide 2011 tour, wrapping up this SOS project, dealing with the issues sorrounding that and other things. Eva is home today studying so Sonya is not occupying the amount of my existence that she usually does. My daily 3 mile run, a Hash-House-A-Go-Go breakfast and an Eddie James music binge out the way, and I wrote this post on paper. From Bed. I'll dispense with any specifics on that one.

Something else is here.

God Bless your life. Good Morning. Good Evening. Sonya is in the living room “cooking” with her Toy Kitchen set and I’m in my room gearing up to go clean my bathroom before making lunch before packing up for my two week trip to the Mid West. The apprehension is almost staggering. I’m in a different place in so many ways that I can’t wait to see the reaction of anyone that notices. And let’s just say they will notice...

Turning your Whine into Water.

God Bless your life. Good Morning. Good Evening. Sonya woke up early and we went walking before the sun got too hot outside so now she is asleep next to a jam filled muffin and a cup of orange juice she is probably going to be sure to redecorate the tan carpet with, unless I change their proximity from each other. One Sec.....

Picking the Cause for the Crowd

Good Morning. Good Evening. God Bless your life. Sonya loves either cartoons or the food network. I don’t trust cartoons much, so guess what she’s watching. Disney and Nickolodeon ruined it for me when it comes to cartoons, but I’m an adult and she’s a kid. I have to keep that in mind. She really is fascinated with the food network though, probably something to do with her love for food, but for a little girl who isn’t even three yet, I think that’s pretty cool.

Some Days will be weak. Some weeks will be a daze

Good morning, regardless. Good evening, regardless. God Bless your life, regardless. Sonya is at her most angelic right now, which is asleep on a couch. I’m trying to listen to uplifting music right and remember all my victories this week so far instead of how average everything feels right now. The last couple of days have had their ups and downs, but my view is one I believe to be same as most, one sided. Why am I stuck on the down side? I wonder how many people ask themselves the question I am asking myself right now.

When the Hard way IS the easy way

I’m sitting in the dining area of our home waiting to keep reminding Sonya to finish her lunch every twelve or so minutes, looking at something that warrants discussion. There’s these three idontknowhatyoucallems  that help decorate the wall above the staircase leading up into the house. Inscribed on each of these are respectively; dance like there’s nobody watching, love like you’ll never get hurt, and sing like there’s nobody listening. All three are basically promoting a well advertised philosophy to make it through life in this broken and dang near hopeless day and age rife with strife and struggle.

The Self Help/Sell Help philosophy

Good Morning and Evening. Good day or night. God Bless you and your life. My niece is carrying around the freakiest looking bald headed pen tattooed doll you’ll ever glance upon in your life and loving on it like a beauty pageant winner. Kids, you got to love them. May she always have that good hearted openness, most people lose it at like, what, six years old?


If you take away anything positive from reading any of this, then I thank God. I’m not writing this to waste anyone’s time. I want this discussion to be free, not cheap. And that’s another thing, I’m not here to sell an agenda. Whatever you take from this whole experience I give, freely. Wisdom, if I have any, should be a gift, not a product. Nothing against people who sell their knowledge, people got to eat and feed families, but I’m no Doctor Phil. Putting a price and a time limit on help of any kind makes puts a price and time limit on it’s effectiveness to me. And maybe it’s just me, but not only do I believe in a God who gives wisdom and knowledge freely, I also believe the wiser we all are, the better off we all are. I want to know as much as possible, so by all means, tell me something enriching. Teach me something to help me that I don’t already know. Something that is going to add to my life, I only write stuff I feel is not only important, but positive.

Maybe I’m saying because it DOES sound like self help material when I read it back to myself. It has even been pointed out to me, today actually as I sat down to write this knowing what I was going to write, by phone by someone who I doubt even reads these. I’m apparently in self help mode. Here are significant differences at least to me though, that I feel need pointed out. I for one don’t think I helped myself, but that’s a whole other blog post. I’m not sure anyone can really help themselves, we just do what we can. And self help books are written by someone else to help THEM make money, at your expense or otherwise. You’re not even the self they really have it in mind to help, especially as help shouldn’t cost money. That’s not help, that’s services rendered, and the whole dynamic changes.

This project isn’t about the answers, it’s about the questions. Anything I write here, I asked about. Any songs I wrote on the project were either genuine questions or genuine reflections. I really feel when or how I asked these questions saved my life, so I put my answers on hold (Lifelines) and decided the questions mattered more because people die asking them. And buy asking them. And I want to see if anyone finds the questions as important as I think they are.

Or maybe I just never heard an answer or full explanation that I liked from watching Oprah, leave alone Doctor Phil. Maybe it’s both.